Ashlyn and Mother's day out

Ashlyn started Mother's day out a week before Sophia started school and goodness it was so hard to send them both off at once. I had a mental breakdown at work when I talked about having alone time without them. It would be weird...I thought, because I always have atleast one of them with me at all times. What would I do?
Sophia and I dropped her off the first day and lets just say horrible would be putting it lightly. Only family has watched until this point and she has severe stranger anxiety. I took Sophia to the same Mother's day out program at the same age and it was a breeze, she just walked in and waved bye to me...Ashlyn, on the other hand, decided to become a spider monkey. When I went to put her down in her classroom she had a Kung Fu grip around my neck and waist...once I freed her arms her legs would tighten around me. All at once I felt hot, started to sweat and then it was all down hill from there.... a wave of panic rushed over me... I felt so guilty, sad, and then my tears started flowing. I was almost ashamed of myself...I rarely show emotion in public, but, she is my baby and I rarely make her do things against her will and it felt so wrong. I knew she needed to go and it was good for her no matter how difficult the day was for the both of us...so, I managed to pull her off of me and handed her to a teacher...I grabbed Sophia's hand and we ran out of there. I picked her up an hour early and was relieved to see her running around playing ball with "my friends" as she calls them. I still miss her, but it is nice to get my first mani-pedi that I have had in months!